The way we communicate with others on a daily basis reveals a lot about ourselves. Little cues like body language, dialect, hand gestures, vocabulary and facial expressions all combine in unique ways that make communication an extension of our personality.
Our characters are no different. In films, actors create the physical aspects of dialogue and in books, it’s up to you the writer to convey the way your characters communicate through words.
Have you ever read a novel without any dialogue? I’ve read a few where the dialogue was really minimal and I’ll tell you, I’ve had a hard time staying awake. Dialogue adds life, it gives you a broader picture of who your character is and where they came from without writing a lot of exposition to explain everything.
Expo-what?
Wikipedia defines exposition as:
“The purpose of exposition is to provide some background and inform the readers about the plot, character, setting, and theme of the essay/story”
Exposition has its place…and it can also be very annoying. I used to do a lot of it in my writing. I hadn’t noticed it until one of our assistant editors pointed it out. And once I saw it? It stuck out like a sore thumb and took me right out of the story.
In my case, I wanted to make sure the reader KNEW EVERYTHING. Mostly a bit of background that I thought helped explain the character’s current actions.
Here’s an example from Loyalties. Harry (driving a horse and carriage) just met Regina (driving a car) after they literally ran into each other on the street. Regina just calmed his stressed-out horse:
“I’ll be damned.” Buddy was as docile as a lamb now. “He likes you.” Which was more than Harry could say for himself. Or was it? She was stunning when she smiled. All he could do was stare.
Then reality set in. He noticed the out of state plates on her car.
What was he thinking? Why would he even consider getting her number when she was just passing through? Besides, he’d just gotten out of one crappy relationship and wasn’t in the mood to dive into another.
So what if it had been over a year since the divorce was final? Harry needed his space despite his friends telling him to get over it already.
“Oh crap.” For the first time he noticed the white streaks of paint on the black car and the matching black streaks on his carriage wheel. Damn, and he just painted those this morning! Not to mention she’d probably want to sue him for scratching up her car.
“I’m sorry about your car. Did you want to exchange insurance information or something? If you get an estimate for a paint job to fix those scratches you can send me the bill.” He hated saying that when he knew he hadn’t done anything wrong, but he also knew how tourists could be. Harry couldn’t allow her to get a bad impression of his company or his town.
Can you spot the exposition? Here’s how the section looked after we took out all the filler:
“I’ll be damned.” Buddy was as docile as a lamb now. “He likes you.” Which was more than Harry could say for himself. Or was it? She was stunning when she smiled. All he could do was stare.
Then reality set in. He noticed the out of state plates on her car.
What was he thinking?
“Oh crap.” For the first time he noticed the white streaks of paint on the black car and the matching black streaks on his carriage wheel.
“I’m sorry about your car. Did you want to exchange insurance information or something? If you get an estimate for a paint job to fix those scratches you can send me the bill.” He hated saying that when he knew he hadn’t done anything wrong, but he also knew how tourists could be.
Spotting exposition takes practice, but here are a few questions I ask myself when looking for it:
- Can this be explained through dialogue? If the answer is yes, then do so.
- Does it need to be said now? Yes: Say it. No: see below
- Will it be explained later in the story? If it’s going to be explained later in another scene, then it can wait. You want to avoid TMI (Too Much Information). It’s okay to create a little mystery for your readers, that’s what turns pages.
In this case, we kept what needed to be shown in the scene. Most of what was deleted was information we reveal through several other discussions Harry and Regina have over the course of the story.
All About Regional Cul-cha
In our house, my roomie teases me when my New York shows (as in drawling pronunciations of “lawn” or “fall”) and I shoot him right back with “Hey, Iowa Boy, there is no ‘th’ at the end of height.”
A character’s background, where they grew up and/or lived will have a big influence on how they speak. Someone who is well-traveled may have a slightly off accent from living in one place too long.
In Loyalties, we have Diego. Born in Baton Rouge and later having moved back to the ancestral Cajun homeland of Quebec, his dialogue is a strong mix of both cultures, which is all well and good until he gets riled. Then fuhgeddaboudit…ain’t no way no one is gonna understand a single word the man says.
Different parts of the country will have different words for the same thing. Think about a hero sandwich. In the New York it’s a hero. In Philly, it’s a hoagie. And out west here, it’s a sub. Do you drink pop or soda? Do you wear tennis shoes or sneakers? Does your car have a boot or a trunk? How about a jumper/sweater to go with those tennies?
Give Me Some ‘Tude!
What characters said these quotes (take a shot at a guess in the comments):
- “What good is a reward if you ain’t around to use it? Besides, attacking that battle station is not my idea of courage. It’s more like, suicide.”
- “Once you have eliminated the impossible, whatever remains, however improbable, must be the truth.”
- “Every man dies, not every man really lives.”
What can you tell about the above three characters based on those quotes alone? They’re definitely all strong personalities, that much is obvious. They’re also all very confident. But it’s the manner of confidence that makes each unique.
Is your bad guy a snob or a lower-class slob? What about your hero’s little sister? Is she a spoiled brat or totally in awe of her older sibling? How many ways can you think of to portray your character through attitude alone?
Speak With A Purpose
If you think about it, I’m sure you can come up with more ways your characters reveal themselves through dialogue. Remember, this is all about communication and every bit of dialogue you put into your story has a purpose…unlike real life where people may ramble on forever with no point at all. Well, they could in your story too. That is, if you needed them to for a reason.
Whether you’re using your dialogue to endear your character to your readers or to advance the plot, make it rich and delicious. Don’t spill every juicy secret too soon, but don’t be stingy either. Give your audience a banquet. Engage your characters in verbal jousts and witty warfare. Think of all those good lines you thought of after the fact and use them. Your readers will thank you.
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